April 17, 2010: A Tribute

On this day thirteen years ago two of my favourite people made a promise to each other. On a cold and rainy Saturday, they stood in front of all their friends, their parents, and their seven still-living grandparents, looked each other in the eye, and promised they would stand together and look after each other for the rest of their lives. Thirteen years and two kids later, their promise is stronger than ever.

Their photographer was not only professional, he was prophetic. Probably half of his shots contained umbrellas, and one of the most memorable was of Trin and Lisa waltzing alone together on a wooden deck in the driving April rain, lost in each other. “For richer or poorer, for better or for worse…” these two understood that “the deal” was just that – through thick and thin.

Lisa and Trinden had met a decade earlier at driving school when they were still in their teens, dated a few times, then moved on to separate lives. When fate brought them together again after ten years, it didn’t take long for them to realize they had something very special and forever.

But it’s not all fairy tales. They’ll both tell you that a successful relationship is hard work, and it’s intentional. It works only if you’re considerate of one another, respectful, attentive, and supportive. The one who is up must carry the one who is down. If mistakes are made, they are allowed to wash away downstream and not be coddled for future advantage. The purse is a common purse, the savings are for a joint tomorrow.

The advantage of their union is not just to the couple, or even to their children, but to them as individuals, and to their friends and to their families. As they draw together in unity, they draw all of us together to the point Karen and I consider Lisa’s parents Mark and Anne as part of our family, and we are part of theirs.

When there’s a “girls night” at our home, Lisa is our daughter every bit as much as Chris and Cass and Megs, and what goes on in the craft room stays in the craft room, the boys being sent into harsh exile with beers around the campfire.

The point of all this? First, that Karen and I are blessed by wonderful children, of whom Trin and Lisa are but two of eight, four by birth and four by choice. Second, that all relationships are hard work, but they have their own rewards. Third, that the cycle never ends, as David and Mallory watch their parents impact the world for good, and will soon enough spread their wings to show us things we’ve never dreamed.

And those are just a few of the many reasons I have hope.

NOTICE: PLEASE READ!!! If you are a lawyer, or can influence a lawyer, please read the notice in the RED BOX below. This is a matter of critical importance to the legal profession of Ontario.

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