Is it Michael or Mícheál?

Many people think that Michael is the most Irish of Irish names, but actually, the true Irish name is Mícheál (note the letter reversal). And to be truthful, Michael is actually of Hebrew origin, the name of one of the highest angels, and means either “who is like God?” or “gift from God”. Jews, Christians, and Muslims alike include Michael the Archangel in their scriptures, so the name is both ancient and widespread.

While “Mike” may sound like a tough little Irish kid, “Miguel” comes at you with Latin charm, and Mikhail Gorbachev seemed as Russian as Russian can be. In other words, like so many things in life, a label or a coat of paint can totally change our perception of something. You can triple the price if you re-label beef stew as “Boeuf Bourguignon”. “Zeitgeist” sounds so much more learned and weighty than “spirit of the times”.

At Costco, you can have the house brand, or you can have the name brand for 30% more. Different labels, same container, same stuff, same factory. And yet Costco sets out both products, side by side, because some people just don’t like the house brand.

And at McDonald’s, a quarter-pounder sounds so much more substantial than a dinky little four-ouncer. Check the math, not the name.

“What’s in a name?”, the Bard asked. Well, actually, quite a bit. Our cultural and linguistic biases kick in, deep within our subconscious, and infuse an object with all the prejudices of our hearts, for better or for worse. When your daughter tells you that she’s bringing Cedric or Anthony around to meet the family, your expectations are high, confident that she’s bringing around a nice, wholesome, white, witty, handsome young man, worthy of your Princess. But wait till she says she’s bringing Abdullah, or Xiang, or Ndolo, or Mary-beth! In most Canadian families, the first dinner is going to be polite, but awkward.

The last time I checked, Michael’s mother, and Meical’s mother, and Michel’s mother, and Michelle’s mother, and Mikel’s mother, and Mykaela’s mother all loved their kids, raised them to be respectful and truthful and hardworking, and until you learn their names, they all seem quite the same and quite likable. And that’s the way it should remain, even when we learn their names.