Meic and the Imaginary Burglar

Meic is so typically Border Collie, nearly human in his reactions. And none more so than when he gets caught out.

Take when he gets worked up over the imaginary burglar. Long after it’s absolutely certain there’s not a bad guy for miles, he remains facing the door, hackles raised, fierce growls rumbling from his chest, ready to do battle. Of course he knows there’s nobody there and never was. And we know, and he knows that we know, and we know that he knows that we know. So now Meic has to figure out how to deal with getting caught out.

He backs away, still rumbling and glaring fearsomely, then slips us a glance out of the corner of his eye, hoping for some reassurance. We try our best not to laugh. Finally, he stalks off to a corner, still muttering, job well done. “Good boy, Meic!”

I don’t know about you, but I do that kind of thing all the time. I say something that’s clearly over the top. I rashly take some wild-eyed position. Or I’ll buy some deeply useless bauble on a whim. And a thousand more really dumb things. And then, of course, I know and everybody knows that I’ve been caught out.

Most of the time I do exactly what Meic does – I pretend that what I just did was intentional and clearly reasoned. Of course I planned to buy that Mickey Mouse sweater, because it’s a really good investment. Yes, yes, I meant every word of what I said about Jim Bob. Now, what the heck did I say, anyway? Doesn’t matter, because if I said it, I meant it!

Owning up to stupidity is perhaps the most difficult thing in life, yet I give myself abundant occasion to practice. And, of course, the more profound the stupidity, the more difficult it is to walk it back.

Owning up to our mistakes is healthy for at least two reasons. First, there’s nothing quite like a good serving of crow to cure any appetite for repetition. Second, it’s far better to have a reputation for being merely human than it is for being sketchy.

Dear old Meic has a limited audience for his railings against imaginary bad guys, and in any event we’d rather he be too vigilant than not vigilant enough. But my audiences, and yours, are larger, more perceptive, and constantly calibrating their views about our reputation for honesty and wisdom. We’re judged by a higher standard.

Oh, and one more thing! The longer Meic tries to pull off his bluff, the harder we laugh. Same for me – the longer I deny being caught out, the tougher it is to climb out. But of course, crow is least unpalatable when fresh out of the oven.