My Trump Necktie
About eight or ten years ago, when Trump was only a fake television tycoon and before he became a fake emperor, I bought one of his branded neckties on sale. At 50% off it was reasonably priced. It was red, of course.
It was like any other necktie I owned, except that in true Donald fashion he had affixed a huge, ersatz gold TRUMP medallion to the thing, tacky and gaudy.
Partly because I recoil at the notion I should pay somebody to advertise on their behalf, and partly because the bauble was so big, cheaply made, and had sharp edges, I quickly shucked the thing off and threw it out before it could further injure my shirt or my sensibilities. Otherwise, the tie was decent enough and saw its fair share of use.
So it was with mixed emotions that I came home from work one evening to be greeted by Bennie the Shih Tzu, dozens of red threads hanging from his giddy grin. He’d obviously been having a very good time, the evidence of which was all over the house. My days of wearing anything Trump branded were over.
One of the last chewed-up remnants that I discovered was part of a tag upon which could be seen “RUMP Made in China”. I’ve kept it as a memento.
To this day, whenever I hear the Donald braying about China’s perfidy, my mind goes back to that little shredded tag: “RUMP Made in China”. Sorry, Donnie, I still can’t take you seriously.