Dealing With Murphy

Murphy, of Murphy’s Law, has a particular interest in professionals. It’s because he knows that professionals need to get things absolutely right, and Murphy’s role in life is to make sure things go absolutely wrong.

If you’re the pizza delivery guy, it’s only when you ring the doorbell that you discover the pizza was boxed upside down. If you’re going to be delivering a keynote address of some importance, it’s immediately after you’ve been glowingly introduced that the sound system begins to wail like a banshee. If you’re an advocate, somebody will have forgotten to put the authorities pages in your appeal brief. If you’re a roofer, it’s only after the supplier has closed for the weekend that you will discover that the last package of shingles is mismatched, and the weatherman is calling for 48 hours of rain.

That’s just the way it is. You’ve got plenty of your own stories.

So, knowing that Murphy is out to get you at the worst possible time, what can you do?

Option A: Never leave your cave.

Option B: Be prepared for Murphy. Here are seven useful things to know–

1. Murphy targets everyone, but he prefers the unprepared.

2. Murphy rarely strikes twice. This is why having a Plan B is such a great idea.

3. Murphy loves crowds. The larger your audience, the more likely that Murphy will be in it.

4. The more critical the matter, the more likely Murphy will appear. This is why practicing workarounds in advance is so critical.

5. Murphy delegates the little jobs. For instance, he has installed “urgency chips” in all technology such as printers, scanners and copiers. With algorithms which detect the dilation of your pupils, the number of swear words you utter, and the drop-dead dates on the actual documents, these chips detect with 94.7% accuracy when the job at hand is last-minute critical, and will trigger a major malfunction. This usually happens after the help desk has closed for the weekend. Know this before you put all your eggs in a particular technology basket.

6. If he finds you interesting, Murphy will keep you as a pet. If you respond with a laugh and a shrug, he’ll usually move on to the next victim. But if you get ugly and cranky, he’ll camp out in your office.

7. Murphy especially loves to lie in wait for the cocky. The minute you think you’ve got everything under control, he’ll make his appearance.

8. The later you wait to start something, the more surely he’ll show up.

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You get my point.